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News from Travistan

The Probe Reports from the
Sovereign Apartment
Nation of Travistan


President Travis

In-Laws' Occupation of Travistan Ends Peacefully

TRAVAMABAD, TRAVISTAN (DPI) - After a tense two-day standoff and the negotiation of numerous Travistani concessions, the occupation of Travistan by a fringe group of radical in-laws ended without bloodshed Sunday evening. Led by a powerful opposition leader known to the media only as "The Mother-In-Law," rebels stormed the front door of the apartment-nation late Friday afternoon, bearing anti-Travistani standards of sparkling wine and sushi platters. After a brief period of initial military response, the Travistani national defense system was neutralized through bribes of Beggin' Strips and a good long belly-rub. The infiltrators occupied Travamabad's central and Guest Room districts for two full days, until intense negotiations with self-declared Dictator and President-For-Life Travis convinced them to move on to his wife's sister's place. According to sources, the rebels will find there a comfortable futon and better strategic proximity to the nearby beach park.


(Reported by Travis Ruetenik)





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