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01/28/03

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President Travis

News From Travistan

The Daily Probe Reports from the
Sovereign Apartment Nation of Travistan


Travistan Officially Recognized by
Representative of India
TRAVAMABAD (DPI) - In a landmark diplomatic announcement, the Nation of Travistan was recognized by India, the first other country to establish formal relations with the tiny apartment-nation. Represented by President Travis and Raj, a guy who President Travis went to high school with, the two nations formally worked out details of an agreement to establish a diplomatic protocol. The cocktail napkin containing the agreement is to be held in the Travistani national archives with a refrigerator magnet.

According to the arrangement, sealed over a shot of Jagermeister at the Mai Tai bar at Ala Moana Center, Travistan will agree to put Raj up on the couch during his yearly diplomatic visits to the nearby beaches in return for official recognition from the nation of more than a billion people.

Critics were quick to question the authority of Raj to formalize deals on behalf of India, as he lives in a suburb of Cleveland and hasn't actually been to India since childhood. Travistan officially rebuffed such fears in a statement, indicating that in return for its covering of the $34.61 bar tab, India would send a formal document with a bunch of diplomatic stuff on it a few days after Raj returns to his office in Ohio.

(Reported by Travis Ruetenik)


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