CURRENT ISSUE 2/11/02 Front Page Weekly Features Advice from Strangers Ain't That America? To-Do List: Charlie Brown Moth's Diary News from Travistan Movie Corner Info Archives Crap Shop Who's at Fault? Contact Us!	Etymology Professor Praises Use of "Earthy, Vulgar Quadrilaterals " in Student's "Fuck off" Note ANN ARBOR, MI [DPI] - Robert Fleck, a 21-year-old college student, was taken aback at the lack of reaction by Professor Michael Higgins to his declaration that "this class is fucked way to shit!" Expecting an immediate and profane rebuke, Mr. Fleck was greeted with praise from his professor. "Nice use of the past tense form on the Old Low German root, Mr. Fleck. Can you tell the class about the formation of spontaneous idioms using quadriliterals like the phrase you just used?" Higgins, a tenured professor of linguistics at the University of Michigan, often attempts to use outbursts in class to demonstrate how our language came to become a useful tool in communicating facts, desires and even anger. "Recently, I had a young lady turn in an essay that was supposed to be a historical view of the role of the Norman Conquest in 1066 A.D. in the degermanization of the English language. However, she turned in an essay that was a brilliant demonstration of the use of 4-letter expletives." Former students, such as Dave Youngman, expressed frustration, but respect for the class. "Sure, it is a hard fucking nut to crack, but once you learn the history of words, you come to realize that our present-day aversion to words are strongly cultural. Besides, those fuckwads and cunts need to just do the work like I did and quit the whining shit," said Youngman. (Reported by Ross Brown)
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