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Well-Compensated Beneficiaries of
American Hegemony Pout About War

MOUNTAIN VIEW, Calif. (DPI) - Despite their current high earnings, and despite sitting near the top of the heap of people who stand to benefit from the expansion of American hegemony throughout the Middle East, many Bay Area professionals have chosen to pout over the current war of conquest. "Okay, so I get that the only way to rebuild Iraq is to flood world markets with cheap Iraqi oil, which will drive prices down, push the U.S. economy into overdrive and make me another pile of money, but, like, couldn't we do that without blowing so many people up?" said management consultant Candice Tuscani.

Aerospace engineer Alan Chow echoed her sentiments. "The post-war retooling of the military alone will pump over $100 billion into the economy, which is bound to help, and maintaining a military sufficient to enforce a de facto U.S. empire has got to be good news for my job prospects," he said. "But still, it makes me uncomfortable when we stomp on people around the world like this." The consensus among high-income professionals is that the U.S. government should work to find a way of manipulating the world economy to their benefit that makes them feel less guilty about it than all-out war.

(Reported by Joseph Moore)

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