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03/25/03

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News From Travistan


The Daily Probe Reports from the
Sovereign Apartment Nation of Travistan



Travistan Applies for U.N. Membership

TRAVAMABAD (DPI) - In a move described by strategists as "bold" and "kinda stupid," the Nation of Travistan today inquired into becoming a member of the United Nations. "I'm hoping they can send me a brochure or something," said Dictator and President-for-Life Travis after phoning the international body's New York headquarters on what he described as his "own nickel." "I understand they have meetings where you can wear headphones," he added.

Frustrated in recent weeks by both the U.S. State Department's hard-line stance on Iraq and the City and County of Honolulu's "Fascist" parking enforcement division, Travistan hopes the international organization can help establish the apartment-nation's legitimacy in "snooty foreign circles." "That angry letter to the editor last month doesn't seem to be working," said President Travis. The U.N. refused to comment on whether it would recognize the tiny sovereign state, referring further questions to its legal department.


(Reported by Travis Ruetenik)





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