CURRENT ISSUE 6/3/03 Front Page Weekly Features Advice from Strangers Ain't That America? Frank Haskins Musing with Mitch Moth's Diary News from Travistan Info Archives Crap Shop Who's at Fault? Contact Us! Aye, mateys! Get you some Daily Probe booty!	Man, I Really Bagged the Wife Last Night A guest Probeatorial by Larry Swanson I don't normally like to brag, but I just have to tell you people: I really gave the wife the high hard one last night. And you want to hear the really amazing part? It was so easy. Nothing to it. She was easier to get into than a community college. Didn't even put up a fight. Yes, I'm that good. We were just sitting on the couch watching cable, and we had both tossed back a few brewskis. It only takes two or three cans of Coors to get Sharon juiced, so before Battlebots was even half over, I knew I was in. First, I got one hand into her titslinger, and with the other one, I was working her snatch. After a minute or two of that, she was all panting and moaning like a cat in heat. Then I had her doing some serious knob-gobbling while I watched the rest of the show. It didn't take long after that. Before long, I was hitting that ass of hers with everything I had, with my underwear dangling from one ankle. Right there on the goddamn couch. For the grand finale, we went into the shower for a good old-fashioned wetfuck. My buddies are always complaining that they never get any from their wives. Not this guy. My wife puts it out. (Transcribed by Gus Harris)
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