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8/13/02

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News from Travistan

The Daily Probe Reports from the
Sovereign Apartment
Nation of Travistan


President Travis


Travistan Upholds Old Navy Embargo

TRAVAMABAD (DPI) - The government of Travistan today issued a terse ultimatum to the owner of Old Navy Stores to either cease all television advertising or face immediate economic, and possibly military, sanctions from the apartment-nation.

Dictator and President-For-Life Travis said that his country considered the retailer's unprovoked barrage of prime-time high volume promotion a "serious act of aggression with clear criminal motivation" against the Travistani populace. "We will not sit in our recliners quietly while the scourge or moronic retro-hip advertising continues to victimize our people during Crocodile Hunter," said Travis to members of the press during a bathroom break. "The people of this great nation deserve better," he added, munching on a Chee-to.





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