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Musing With Mitch  

by Mitchell Kobriger  

Mitchell Kobriger

What the hell kind of name is J.Lo? Not that I would kick her off my footsie team.

One thing ol' Mitch doesn't understand at all: Hieroglyphics.

Some jobs are just jobs -- but beware the barber who doesn't live and breathe hair cutting.

You know what? I have no idea what I did during the Vietnam War, and apart from some of these scars, that's just fine with me.

You think maybe those hurricanes know something we don't about Florida?

My two cents: Things in Iraq will just keep getting worse until somebody finally lets the Guardian Angels have a crack at those troublemakers.

You couldn't pay me to eat raw fish, although I'd probably do it on a dare.

Idea! The fast-food folks should try putting the meat on the outside and the bun in the middle for a "reverse" burger? Sure, it's crazy, but it just might work.

Why doesn't anybody ever say "Does not compute!" anymore? I used to love that.

If I ever went back in time, I would travel to two months ago when that waitress from the truck stop in Denton wouldn't stop flirting on me. That was one helluva night, my friends.

Kings with underrated fashion sense: Larry, Don and Tut.

There isn't a home decor in America that couldn't be improved with some well-placed macrame.

You can't make coffee too hot, too sweet or too Irish.

Hey, Mr. Waiter, keep your wussy little lemon wedges the hell away from my water glass and we'll get along just fine.

If the water isn't scorching hot, I see no point in taking a shower.

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