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Mom Used Bad Intel to Justify Eating Broccoli ATHENS, Ga. (DPI) - Neighborhood children are fuming on learning that a local mom used bad intelligence to justify the eating of broccoli. During dinner last week, 8-year-old Dennis Cummings claims his mom made the statement: "Eat it and be thankful. There are children starving in Switzerland!" to get him to finish his broccoli, a side dish he finds particularly reprehensible. "She also said I couldn't have dessert or play my XBox until I was done," said the shaken Cummings during a hastily convened press conference in the backyard treehouse. "But who's to say what impact those starving Swiss kids had on my final decision?" In the end, Billy endured and finished all but two bites of the pungent green vegetable. The next day, Cummings asked one of his second-grade teachers what could be done to help the starving children of Switzerland. At the teacher's long, hearty laugh, his classmates directed mocking stares and gestures toward Cummings. Once calm, the teacher explained that the people of Switzerland enjoy one of the highest standards of living in the world. Furthermore, said the teacher, Switzerland's indigent are protected by a well-funded, efficiently run social welfare system that provides all the basic necessities and starving isn't an option for a Swiss citizen. When confronted with the truth, an unrepentant Cummings' mom summarily dismissed it. "My information came from a documentary I saw years ago," she said. "Now that I think about it, it was on Swaziland, not Switzerland. No matter. There is plenty of other evidence that says eating broccoli is good for you. End of story!" The scandal has led neighborhood children to openly challenge other tidbits of parental advice. "Hey, maybe I won't take someone's eye out running with a stick," said one sandy-haired youth who would not disclose his name. "And that whole 'Santa won't come if you're awake' thing? That's starting to sound like a whole lot of hooey to me." (Reported by Melina Osberg)

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