CURRENT ISSUE 10/28/03 Front Page Weekly Features Advice From Strangers Ain't That America? Musing With Mitch Moth's Diary News From Travistan Info Previous Issues Crap Shop Who's at Fault? Contact Us! Aye, mateys! Get you some Daily Probe booty!	News From Travistan The Daily Probe Reports from the Sovereign Apartment Nation of Travistan Citizenry Concerned as President Goes Sleepless TRAVAMABAD (DPI) - Constituents and political allies of Dictator and President-for-Life Travis showed concern for the leader of this 2-year-old apartment-nation as he wandered the streets and hallways, unable to sleep at 2:53 a.m. Tuesday. Following a long day of presidenting, including folding laundry, feeding the princess and watching the Chargers/Dolphins game, Travis just couldn't sleep, a spokesperson said. The government Task Force on Nocturnal Affairs has sprung into action, suggesting sleep-inducing activities including watching shopping channels on TV, sitting on the balcony in underwear and eating the rest of the surplus potato salad left in the fridge. Should the sleepless period continue for another hour, it is likely that the Vice President and Minister for Domestic Affairs will take over duties of the presidency, starting with taking out the garbage in the morning. (Reported by Travis Ruetenik)
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