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11/11/02 Front Page Features Advice from Strangers Ain't That America? To-Do List Moth's Diary News from Travistan Movie Corner Info Archives Crap Shop Who's at Fault? Contact Us! |
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Aye, mateys! Get you some Daily Probe booty! 
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News from Travistan The Daily Probe Reports from the Sovereign Apartment Nation of Travistan |
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Travistan Aglow in Loud Shirts 
negotiating for new shirts. The nation acquired three of Bailey's vintage
Hawaiian shirts, sized large, for 714 Travistani Trachma ($10 US). Not all
Travistanis were thrilled with the economic package, however. The
opposition Wife Party called the shirts "gross and awful," yet conceded that
at that price, the new clothing could be used as bedding for the
apartment-nation's newly homeless feline community (inset). Said President
Travis, "No longer will our people shiver when the
autumn winds howl off the mountain. Let the masses be clothed in a
cornucopia of greens, purples and blues. And a kind of pukey
mustard-yellow."
(Reported by Travis Ruetenik)
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