CURRENT ISSUE 11/19/02 Front Page Weekly Features Advice from Strangers Ain't That America? To-Do List: Eminem Moth's Diary News from Travistan Movie Corner Frank Haskins Info Archives Crap Shop Who's at Fault? Contact Us! Aye, mateys! Get you some Daily Probe booty!	FBI Agent Having Hard Time Finding Female Bodies to Inspect MIAMI BEACH, Fla. (DPI) - With wide sectors of the economy experiencing serious downturns, Female Body Inspector Michael Doogleberg is just one of many FBI Agents having a hard time finding female bodies to inspect. "Yeah, I like totally blame it on the economy and stuff," said Doogleberg, known as Dooger to his partner and fellow Beach High alum Agent Matt "Hard Core" Corman. "When times were good, dude, you could scope chicas all over the Aventura Mall," explained Doogleberg. "But with companies freezing new hires and considering layoffs, female employees are holding back on discretionary spending, and this has left many of the primo female inspection zones -- malls, outdoor malls, and shopping centers -- almost totally babe-free." The Female Body Inspection sector is in such disarray that Doogleberg is giving serious consideration to a lateral move into a Bikini Patrol position or possibly Fox Hunting. "Bikini Patrol officers are like totally respected," said Corman. (Reported by Slick Sharkey)
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