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Dokken to Cease Use of Pyrotechnics
in Future Shows, Should They Occur

LOS ANGELES, Calif. (DPI) - Dokken, the '80s metal hair band known for songs such as Just Got Lucky and Unchain The Night, has announced that they would stop using pyrotechnic effects in their shows, should any actually occur in the future. The announcement was made shortly after the news of the Rhode Island tragedy involving pyrotechnic effects from the band Great White.

"In the event that we are asked to perform in a club, we will not use our normal stage set-up with pyrotechnic effects," said Don Dokken, lead singer and songwriter for the eponymous band. "This ban on pyrotechnic effects will also be extended to weddings, bar mitzvahs, corporate gatherings or strip-mall openings."
Don Dokken performing in 1989 in a last known concert appearance.
Dokken today in his basement recording studio and rec room.

Dokken also announced that they would remove several songs from their playlist, including Into the Fire and Burning Like a Flame. Additionally, Dream Warriors, a song recorded for the horror film Nightmare on Elm Street 3, would also be dropped from the playlist to prevent audiences from being crushed in an attempt to flee the concerts.

The bands Ratt, Poison and Whitesnake could not be reached for comment, as their whereabouts are completely unknown. Motley Crüe also did not return calls as the entire band was busy fucking Pam Anderson on video.

(Reported by Ross Brown)

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