Identical Twins Forget Which is Which
MINNEAPOLIS (DPI) - Candy and Mandy Thompson have a dilemma on their hands.
Somewhere along the line, the twin sisters forgot who was who. From birth,
their parents and extended family found it impossible to distinguish the two
apart, but for the last several years, even Candy and Mandy have lost track
of their true identity.
"We just, like, sort of forgot," explained one of the confused clones. "One
night we were drinking, like, sooo much beer at Brad's party and my sister
introduced herself as 'Mandy' to this cute guy. I didn't know if she was
wrong or if I just had too much Coors Light, but I thought I was Mandy. Our
friends at the party couldn't remember either, cause they were wasted by
then. We argued a little bit, then we laughed so hard I almost peed my
pants. So we both dated that cute guy for a couple months, but I can't
remember his name either."
The carbon-copy couple have no distinguishing characteristics such as a
birthmark or scar to set them apart. "I burned my neck on a curling iron a
few years ago, but unfortunately it healed," said one of the dumbfounded
duo. The problem is compounded by the fact that they share a room and
all of their clothes are also identical. "Would it have killed mom and dad
to have bought us completely different gifts once in a while?" asked one of
the two. "We always have to open our presents at the same time because the
gifts are the same. It's so lame. And now we have nothing to tell ourselves
apart. We have some different CDs, but I can't remember if the CDs I don't
like are because they belong to my sister, or if I've just gotten tired of
listening to them."
The sisters have a long history of playing tricks on teachers and friends by
switching places and pretending to be each other, but now the joke is on
them. "The school year was just starting, so I decided to take 'Candy's'
classes. I'm in second-year French and I don't remember any of this stuff.
And this total loser guy in class keeps acting like he knows me so well.
What's his problem?" The other sister voiced similar complaints about her
band class. "I guess I should have practiced the flute more over the summer
cause I really stink at it. I didn't even know I owned a flute."
If the true identity can not be determined by the end of the semester, their
father will flip a coin and assign the name "Mandy" to whoever picks
"heads," followed by an immediate trip to the tattoo parlor for one of the
"I don't really care which name I get," said the frustrated flutist. "Mandy
is 45 minutes older, so that's cool, but 'Candy' comes first alphabetically,
(Reported by Buddy Fisher)
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